Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Priyanka Kareena

From a tabloid:

In,Koffee with Karan, Kareena Kapoor who came along with beau Saif Ali Khan
in the show said, "I wonder where Priyanka got her accent from?"

When asked to comment on Kareena's query, Priyanka Chopra, who came along
with rumoured boyfriend Shahid Kapoor on Karan's show had a smart reply for
her arch rival, "I want to tell Kareena that I got my accent from the same
place where her boyfriend (Saif Ali Khan) got his," referring to Saif and
her education overseas.


Priyanka left no scope for doubt that the actors shared icy vibes, when she
was asked what would she steal from computers of Bollywood superstars like
Shah Rukh Khan, Shahid, Kareena and others. Priyanka giggled and asked,
"Does Kareena have a computer in the first place?"

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Believe in your presence of mind !!! ....

Presence of mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In a shop a man asked for 1/2 kg of butter. The salesperson, a young boy,
said that only 1kg packs were available in the shop, but the man insisted
on buying only 1/2 kg. So the boy went inside to the manager's room and
said "An idiot outside wants to buy only 1/2 kg of butter". To his
surprise, the customer was standing behind him. So the boy added
immediately, "And this gentleman wants to buy the other half!!!!!!".

After the customer left, the manager said "You have saved your position
by being clever enough at the right time. Where do you come from?". To this
the boy said, "I come from Mexico. The place consists of only prostitutes
and football players!!!!!".

The manager replied coldly, "My wife is also from Mexico ".

To this the boy asked excitedly, "Oh yeah? Which team does she play for?"

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Madhuri is back

(See attached file: mads.jpg)
Madhuri said she dances daily and that keeps her slim....
looking at the pic,i feel i am so slim

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Rajinikanth_99 Jokes

Just for fun!!!


1. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea.

2. When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.

3. There is no such thing as evolution, it's just a list of creatures that Rajinikanth allowed to live.

4. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile.

5 .Rajnikanth can divide by zero.

6. Rajinikanth can judge a book by it's cover.

7. Rajinikanth can drown a fish.

8. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.

9. Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs.

10. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door.

11. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.

12. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald's, and got it.

13. Rajinikanth can win at Solitaire with only 18 cards.

14. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off.

15. Rajinikanth can build a snowman out of rain.

16. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.

17. Rajinikanth can make onions cry.

18. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

19. Rajinikanth can watch the show 60 minutes in 20 minutes.

20. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice.

21. Rajinikanth will attain separate statehood in 2013.

22. Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day.

23. Rajinikanth once got into a knife-fight. The knife lost.

24. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano.

25. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.

26. The only man who ever outsmarted Rajinikanth was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved.

27. Rajinikanth can talk about Fight Club.

28. Rajinikanth doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.

29. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Rajinikanth lives in Chennai.

30. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.

31. Rajinikanth does not own a stove, oven, or microwave, because revenge is a dish best served cold.

32. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.

33. Rajinikanth doesn't move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth.

34. Rajinikanth knows Victoria's secret.

35. Water boils faster when Rajinikanth stares at it.

36. Rajinikanth can throw the Thackerays out of Mumbai.

37. Rajinikanth kills two stones with one bird.

38. Google won't find Rajinikanth because you don't find Rajinikanth; Rajinikanth finds you.

39. Rajinikanth gave the Joker those scars.

40. Rajinikanth leaves messages before the beep.

41. Rajinikanth once warned a young girl to be good "or else". The result? Mother Teresa.

42. Rajinikant electrocuted Iron Man.

43. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.

44. Rajinikanth can make PCs better than the Mac.

45. Rajinikanth puts the 'laughter' in manslaughter.

46. Rajinikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.

47. Rajinikanth can handle the truth.

48. Rajinikanth can speak Braille.

49. Rajinikanth can dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks.

50. Rajinikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.

51. Rajinikanth calls Voldemort by his name.

52. Who do you think taught Voldemort Parseltongue? Rajinikanth did.

53. Chuck Norris once met Rajinikanth. The result - He was reduced to a joke on the internet.

54. Rajinikanth got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated.

55. Rajinikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth.



56. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

57. The last time Rajinikanth killed someone, he slapped himself to do it. The other guy just disintegrated. Resonance.

58. Rajinikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.

59. Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

60. Rajinikanth can run at speed of light around a tree and screw himself.

61.Rajinikant can lick his elbows.

62. Rajinikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

63. Rajinikant does not get frostbite. Rajnikant bites frost.

64. Rajinikant doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

65. Rajinikant got his drivers license at the age of 16 seconds.

66. When you say “no one is perfect”, Rajinikant takes this as a personal insult.

67. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.

68. Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajinikanth was born.

69. The statement "nobody can cheat death", is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.

70. When Rajnikanth is asked to kill some one he doesn't know, he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out.

71. Rajinikant can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.

72. Rajinikanth knows what women really want.



73. Time and tide wait for Rajinikanth.

74. Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that's when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.

75. As a child when Rajinikanth had dyslexia, he simply re-scripted the alphabet.

76. Rajinikanth collects Honey from his private Moon - HoneyMoon.

77. Rajinikanth can answer a missed call.

78. Rajinikanth doesn't need a visa to travel abroad, he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates.

79. Rajinikanth's brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury's.

80. Rajinikanth doesn't shower. He only takes blood baths.

81. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Rajinikanth.

82. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Rajinikanth's fist.

83. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth, there is no other way.

84. Rajinikanth's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog.

85. Rajinikant doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint out of fear.

86. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajinikant”.

87. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up.

88. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

89. Rajinikanth is a champion in the game "Hide n' seek", as no one can hide from Rajinikanth.

90. Rajinikant proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction.

91. Rajinikant is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.

92. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Rajinikanth is on.

93. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Rajinikanth.

94. If at first you don't succeed, you're not Rajinikanth.

95. Rajinikanth's first job was as a bus conductor. There were no survivors.

96. Rajinikanth does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

97. When Rajinikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.

98. Rajinikanth is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

99. Rajinikanth's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

Kids!!!

Pelican swallows pigeons!!!

Story from Mirror newspaper,UK!!
 
The unfortunate bird had been eating breadcrumbs near a lake when it was scooped up by the peckish predator.
A crowd gathered as the startled pigeon tried to escape during a frantic 15-minute period. At one point it looked like it was going to break free as the pelican opened its massive beak, allowing its plucky prey to gaze out into the distance.
But the exhausted creature missed its opportunity and, after finally running out of energy, was swallowed whole.
 
Photographer Paul Mansfield, 44, captured the dramatic scene in London's St James's Park.
He said: "I saw a crowd 'ooohhing' and 'argghhhing' at the side of a lake. The pelican would gulp and the pigeon would be sucked down but then came up flapping. The crowd was willing it to escape, shouting 'Come on, you can do it!'"
Pelicans were introduced into the park in the 17th century as a gift from the Russian ambassador. There are currently five living there - so pigeons beware!!!

Ash--- a very simple girl???

Ash has been the only reason for me to watch most of her movies.
 
Recently, Vipul Shah, the director of ACTION REPLAYY, said that Ash i s a very very simple girl, who's untoched by her global success.
Says Shah "Ash is still a very simple girl at heart and really, you don't even have to scratch the surface for that. All this success and glory has not touched her at all even till date. She is just as simple as she was when she had started off years ago."
 
I have always liked Ash, despite her fake accent and poor acting in many movies. But is she that simple ? or is this just a bull for the movie promotion?

Monday, October 18, 2010

KFC

Money can indeed bring happiness!!!
COMING SOOOOON

Old Bank practice.

...COMING SOON

True Friends!!!

Adversity tells u who your true friends are.......i found out during one of the biggest days of my life..

COMING SOON..........

True Friends!!!

Adversity tells u who your true friends are.......i found out during one of the biggest days of my life..

COMING SOON..........

Fatty Foods


I love junk food but like you all know,it is not healthy!!!!

Presenting Top 10 Fatty Foods at the following rediff link:

http://getahead.rediff.com/slide-show/2010/oct/18/slide-show-1-health-the-top-10-fatty-foods.htm

Friday, October 15, 2010

Thursday, October 14, 2010

A Look at world's most expensive homes

Read on :
 

Vulgar display of Wealth!!!

Look at few pics of Mukesh Ambani's new home.

Humble Priyanka!!!


---Picked up the following paragraph from a website!!!!
 
Since her Miss World days some 10 years back, Priyanka has come a long way. She may be a million dollar actress now but hasn’t quite forgotten her humble roots. In fact, she can effortlessly recall her first salary of Rs 5000 which still remains unspent and treasured in the safety of her mom’s almirah.

Priyanka recounts, “Yeah! I still remember how happy I was when I drew my first salary. It was Rs. 5000. My mom never allowed me to deposit my first salary in the bank. She has treasured those notes with her to date. It feels great whenever I see those notes.”


Yes, getting first salary was such awesome feeling!!!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Mallika's research


I thought Mallika had better IQ than Kareena, Deepika and Sonam but I was proved wrong.
On asked what research did she undertake for the role of snakewoman in her upcoming flick 'Hiss",she replied
'I read extensively. I became aware that snakes are cold-blooded creatures; their vision is 180 degrees, they shed skin. Such was my research to pull it off convincingly.'
 
Really? This is "Reasearch?". Even kids know these facts about snakes.
May be some Western media will grant her a PhD for her extensive "research" on snakes.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Sameer's wedding on 10_10_10


My friend Sameer (aka Shameer) got married on 10-10-10.
After all the expenses incurred on my wedding, I have been travelling by train. I didnt have leaves, so I left for hometown Kasaragod on Friday night, 8-Oct-2010.
The train got delayed bya few hours, so I reached home late evening on Saturday,09-Oct-2010.
I discovered that Goa is just 11-12 hrs from Mumbai and the journey till there is not a bit tiring. May be my group should plan out a trip to Goa. What say Rahul/Delcy/Reshma/Poo/Yagnesh/Maulik??
There was a good looking young foreign lady in the compartment.She didn't have a reservation, so was sharing seat with anybody who would agree to!!!
On Sunday morning,went to Faisal's home at Melparamba (10 minutes away from my place) and we headed for the reception at ESSA HALL, Kumble. Nichu was already there, looking hale and hearty. He had taken the responsibility of dulha's makeup and dress.
After sometime, Fahad and cousin Siyam came.
Dulha Sameer looked good in stylish suit. He introduced us to the confident dulhan before we left the place.
It was really good attending the wedding and meeting my friends.
I expected Nichu to wear Pink as he announced in his facebook page that in October he is "going pink" to support breast cancer awareness!!!!
Fahad (probably the smartest among my friends) had us in splits and teased me throughout.
We left around 1pm and in the evening, I returned to Mumbai by "Garib Rath" train. Return Journey was good in this cheap but good AC train. Overall, a very hectic trip but I am glad I made it :-)

Are you drinking enough water?


The following article was emailed by a friend.

   Drinking enough water ?

Water   is an important structural component of skin cartilage, tissues and organs. For human beings, every part of the body is dependent on   water . Our body comprises about 75%   water : the brain has 85%, blood is 90%, muscles are 75%, kidney is 82% and bones are 22%   water . The functions of our glands and organs will eventually deteriorate if they are not nourished with good, clean   water .

The average adult loses about 2.5 litres   water   daily through perspiration, breathing and elimination. Symptoms of the body's deterioration begins to appear when the body loses 5% of its total   water   volume. In a healthy adult, this is seen as fatigue and general discomfort, whereas for an infant, it can be dehydrating. In an elderly person, a 5%   water   loss causes the body chemistry to become abnormal, especially if the percentage of electrolytes is overbalanced with sodium. One can usually see symptoms of aging, such as wrinkles, lethargy and even disorientation.  

Continuous   water   loss over time will speed up aging as well as increase risks of diseases.

If your body is not sufficiently hydrated, the cells will draw   water   from your bloodstream, which will make your heart work harder. At the same time, the kidneys cannot purify blood effectively. When this happens, some of the kidney's workload is passed on to the liver and other organs, which may cause them to be severely stressed. Additionally, you may develop a number of minor health conditions such as constipation, dry and itchy skin, acne, nosebleeds, urinary tract infection, coughs, sneezing, sinus pressure, and headaches.

So, how much   water   is   enough   for you? The minimum amount of   water   you need is 2-3 liters everyday.

 

Unbelievable pics :-)

Friday, October 1, 2010

Rajnikant's magic



Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is
Rajinikanth’s email id is gmail@ rajinikanth.com
Rajinikanth can drown a fish
Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes
Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone
Rajinikanth did, in fact, build Rome in a day
Rajinikanth electrocuted Iron Man
Rajinikanth knows Victoria’s secret
Rajinikanth killed the dead sea
Rajinikanth can divide by zero
Rajinikanth once got into a fight with a VCR player. Now it plays DVDs
The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of its corners off
Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice
Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano
When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn’t lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down
Rajinikanth can delete the recycle bin

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Best Employers List


Read on :

Monday, September 20, 2010

Bank Agent's attitude

Recently, I got a call from a B**c**** bank agent regarding Personal Loan.
I was interested ,so requested him to explain the EMI and the interest rates.
He told me the interest rate but said EMI could be discussed at the bank.
I was called to the bank and the CRM was so eager to take the cheques and to get me sign the agreement.
I requested to explain the scheme. She did but there were so many extra charges that the agent had not told me about.
It would have been stupid of me to go for it as the final amount of interest they were taking was far too high.
I didn't give my cheques or sign the papers. Since then, the agent has been calling me multiple times a day.
He says "maine sanction karwaya hai, toh aaapko lena hoga"...whats this?
He's behaving like the bank has already give the money.After seeing this aggressive attitude of the agent as well as the CRM,I decided I am not going to do anything with this bank. Did anybody have a similar experience at any bank?
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Saturday, September 18, 2010

Attitude

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

Real Friend


A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.

Juhi-Sridevi

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Hi friends

Not been very active since quite some time. Trust me,I am gonna write more stuff and soon.Hope you guys will like it!

Please wait for sometime.
I was trying to get a grip on life as too many things have been happening off late.
Update you soon.
Cheers

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Despising workaholics!!!

There are many people who put in 14+ hours everyday at office...not just freshers but people with 7+ years of experience too.......
It is such a bad trend.Because of such people, there is pressure on others to put in extra hours too....these workaholics are losing their best years this way...trying 2 climb the ladder anyhow.......
If someone is intelligent enough, he should be able to achieve targets within the allotted office hours.
What is the big deal if you slog 14+ hours everyday at office, and on weekends too and then, you finish your targets/projects ahead of schedule? If you had worked only during office hours and achieved the same,yes, you need to be lauded.

BUT NO,sloggers are lauded at most places and encouraged too.............

Freshers do the slogging routine and then say that once they have a family, they will change.But old habits die hard.
I know such a person from my previous company....someone around 40 years...married with 2 kids.....
very often, he would leave home around 4am,5am,6am and go to office....even if ,it was not required..he just loved coming at such hours and sending mails to seniors and gathering accolades..for these,he leaves his poor wife and kids at such unearthly hours...

Though its their life, it affects others at workplace.And these people have a mad rush to learn any technology that some of their colleagues must be working on...They are just sooo boring..

Such people are very successful career-wise but in my humble opinion, they are not successful in life.
what is life if you can`t spend time with your family, friends or with nature ?

hiiiiiiiiiii